Confidence is the cornerstone of success in all aspects of life, yet many of us struggle with it.
When you reflect on your past experiences, it’s likely that a lack of confidence has held you back in some way.
I know firsthand the devastation that can come from not feeling secure in yourself, whether it’s impacting your career, relationships, or social life.
That’s why I’m passionate about sharing tips for becoming a confident man.
In fact, I wish I had a mentor who could have guided me towards building my character and confidence as a young man.
In this blog post, I’ll share seven powerful ways to start becoming a more confident version of yourself today.
Photo by Andrea Piacquadio: https://www.pexels.com/photo/man-in-white-dress-shirt-and-black-blazer-standing-outside-building-832998/
What is a confident man?
Defining a confident man is a challenge, as it is a subjective quality that varies from person to person.
However, we all know one when we encounter him.
A confident man exudes a certain presence that commands attention.
He is comfortable in his own skin, exudes a calm and self-assured demeanor, and a clear sense of purpose.
When he speaks, people listen, and his words carry weight.
There is an intangible quality about him that speaks to depth and quality that others recognize and respect.
To be confident is to embody a certain grace and charisma that draws people towards you.
So no matter how one defines it, a confident guy impresses upon others a sense of security and admiration that is hard to ignore.
Why in the world would you want to be a confident man?
Being a confident man can have a significant impact on various aspects of your life.
Confidence not only helps you in your personal relationships and social interactions but can also make you a valuable asset in your professional life.
Confident men tend to have more self-assurance, initiative, and clarity in their decision-making, which can lead to a more fulfilling and prosperous life.
They are also more likely to take risks and pursue their goals relentlessly, knowing that they have the ability to overcome any obstacles that come their way.
Confidence is a trait that can be learned and developed through practice and mindset shifts.
So, whether you’re looking to improve your personal or professional life, there’s no better time to work on developing your confidence than today.
Photo by emre keshavarz: https://www.pexels.com/photo/confident-classy-ethnic-man-standing-in-sunny-countryside-3707987/
Becoming a confident man takes more than just putting on a facade to impress others.
It requires a deep understanding of one’s own character and the willingness to do the hard work of self-improvement.
That’s why my list of 7 ways to start becoming a confident man right now is focused on the development of strong inner qualities.
I haven’t provided a guide to simply acting like a confident man, but instead, I’ve outlined actionable steps that will help you grow into a man you have confidence in.
This approach isn’t about tricking others or faking confidence; it’s about cultivating genuine, long-lasting self-assurance that will earn the confidence of others in turn.
So, begin taking action – follow my list of seven ways to start becoming a confident man, and be prepared to embark on a journey of self-discovery and personal growth.
1). Achieve (Set goals and achieve them)
For men seeking to cultivate self-confidence, setting and achieving goals is a crucial step towards reaching that desired state.
This is because the process accomplishes four things, each of which contributes to building a more confident, accomplished, and focused personality.
Firstly, by setting goals, you are forced to consider and envision what your ideal future looks like, which in turn helps you cultivate a sense of purpose and direction in your life.
Secondly, when you achieve your goals, you gain the confidence that comes from knowing you can accomplish what you’ve set out to do, which is invaluable when it comes to facing future challenges and hurdles.
Thirdly, achieving your goals is almost always a meaningful improvement, whether it involves your health, finances, family, or another key aspect of your life.
Finally, the process of setting and achieving goals helps you get better at overcoming challenges and obstacles and prevents you from developing a habit of quitting when the going gets tough.
By embracing the power of goal-setting and achievement, men can take meaningful steps towards developing greater self-confidence on their life journey.
Action step: Set a goal that you will achieve in the next 7 days.
A good way to think of setting goals is by using the SMART acronym, which stands for Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, and Time-Bound.
For example, maybe one area where you want to improve in your own life is with your communication skills. A goal could be, “I’m going to have conversations with three complete strangers by 8 o’clock PM this Saturday.
One of the signs of a confident man is that he always has goals and is constantly working to achieve them.
But if this doesn’t describe you up until now, give yourself permission to start small, but start right away.
Photo by Anna Nekrashevich: https://www.pexels.com/photo/businessman-man-person-desk-6801871/
2). Strengthen (Build a body that makes you proud)
A non-negotiable component to being a more confident man is having a strong and fit physique.
Building a good physique requires discipline, consistency, and delayed gratification, which can have a significant impact on one’s character development.
Moreover, having a powerful physique not only improves your physical appearance, but also boost your confidence levels in every area of your life.
Whether you join a gym, find a trainer, or get a program you can follow from home with kettlebell or body weight exercises, you have to build your body to be lean, strong, and capable – its almost impossible to be confident without having a body you can be proud of.
You don’t have to be a body builder or fitness model, you just have to look and feel healthy, capable, and strong.
By prioritizing your physical strength, fitness, and overall health, you can build the confidence and character necessary to lead a successful and fulfilling life.
Action step: If regular exercise is not already a part of your life, that needs to change now.
Figure out something you can do consistently for at least 3 days a week that will be challenging yet achievable and start right away.
It could be as simple as a body weight strength routine where you are doing push-ups and body weight squats or you could set a goal to increase your daily steps to 10,000 using an indoor walking pad or getting outdoors for a walk in the park.
Whatever program you do, make sure it’s progressive, meaning you should always be adding more difficulty as you get stronger.
For example, maybe you were doing three sets of 10 push-ups last week; this week, do three sets of 11.
One way to incorporate more physical activity, especially if you are someone with a very busy schedule, is to use something called, micro workouts.
Micro workouts are rase that take five minutes or less to complete and can be done anywhere.
They range from simple movements such as jumping jacks, air squats, and burpees to more complex exercises like kettlebell swings and renegade rows.
The key is to do something every day for at least 5 minutes so you can gradually start seeing the results in terms of phyisical strength and confidence.
Photo by cottonbro studio: https://www.pexels.com/photo/man-in-black-pants-and-black-tank-top-standing-on-brown-wooden-floor-4752861/
3). Do, Build, Fix (Learn to rely on your own capabilities)
Building the capability to take on tasks beyond your comfort zone can be empowering, especially for men looking to boost their confidence.
One option is to start with home improvement or vehicle maintenance tasks.
Start small; whether it’s painting a room or changing your own oil, these projects can provide a sense of accomplishment and self-worth.
Then step up to the next challenge and try remodeling your bathroom.
With the aid of tutorials on YouTube or in person, you can learn the necessary skills to complete these projects efficiently.
Even if you make a mistake, you can always learn from it and start over, likely still cheaper than if you had hired a contractor.
Becoming handy with tools and working with your hands can boost your confidence and give you the capability to take on new challenges.
It’s true, a confident man is a capable man.
Action step: Find something around the house that you can figure out how to fix or improve.
Does installing new tile in the guest bathroom feel just a little bit outside your comfort zone?
That might be just the ticket.
Photo by Tima Miroshnichenko: https://www.pexels.com/photo/a-man-in-white-shirt-painting-a-house-6473982/
4). Think (Discover your own beliefs and opinions)
Learning to think for yourself and cultivate your opinions is key to becoming a confident man.
To achieve this, it’s vital to read regularly.
Reading great literature, history, biographies, and poetry can expand your intellectual horizons and challenge your thinking.
As you develop your opinions, it’s important to be prepared to voice them.
It’s not necessary to have an opinion on everything, but being able to express your perspective on topics important to you is a crucial aspect of building confidence.
Embrace the fact that your opinions may be polarizing, as this can serve to strengthen your beliefs and deepen your understanding of others’ perspectives.
Remember that all leaders are readers, so start cultivating your intellectual independence now.
Action step: Google the top 100 books of all time, choose one you’ve heard of before but have never read, get it and start reading 10 pages a day.
As you read, try to keep an open mind.
Photo by Dziana Hasanbekava: https://www.pexels.com/photo/formal-serious-man-reading-book-on-sofa-7063781/
5). Deliver (Pay the price to make your word mean something)
Keeping your word is a crucial vital to becoming a confident man.
When you commit to something and follow through, you prove to yourself and those around you that you are reliable, trustworthy and that your words carry weight.
While the price of keeping your word may seem high at times, the benefits are immeasurable.
By consistently delivering on what you say you’ll do, you will feel a sense of pride and satisfaction that others can feel and respect.
Your loved ones will trust and believe in you, knowing that you’re a man of action.
The importance of keeping your word should not be underestimated, and by doing so, you’ll grow in confidence and self-assurance.
Additionally, becoming a man of your word will set you apart from the rest, as so few individuals are willing to pay the price to make their word mean something.
You will begin to exude confidence because you will be earning your own trust and the trust of other human beings.
Action step: This one won’t be easy.
The next time you say you will do something, deliver on your statement no matter what the personal cost.
This might be at work with a promise made to your boss or it could be to your wife or one of your children.
A sure sign of confidence in a man, is his ability to keep his word.
6). Decide (Learn to be the decision maker)
Becoming a more confident man requires a critical aspect of decisiveness.
You must be willing to make decisions and stand by them.
Being decisive in small matters like this will lead to bigger decisions with more ease. Trust yourself and your choices.
This trait will gain the trust of those around you, making you a dependable leader.
Moreover, becoming more decisive will make you more attractive to many women, especially the kind you want to be with if you are reading this article.
Not only is decisiveness an attractive quality to women, but it also improves your chances of success in your career or business.
Most people want to follow confident leaders who can make informed decisions quickly.
Mastering this trait will ultimately lead to a more fulfilled and prosperous life as a confident man.
You may be wondering, “If I start being more decisive, won’t I make wrong decisions sometimes?”.
The answer is, absolutely you will, but I would argue that the cost of being indecisive as a man (I don’t know much about being a woman) far outweighs the cost of a bad decision here an there.
Also, as you make more and more decisions, you will increase your competence as well as your confidence.
It’s like building a muscle, it gets stronger with training.
Action step: When asked where to eat, don’t say, “I don’t know. Where do you want to eat?”. Just pick a place.
You’ll start to build more confidence in your self and others will notice.
Photo by Andrea Piacquadio: https://www.pexels.com/photo/smiling-formal-male-with-laptop-chatting-via-phone-3760263/
7). Chase (Find and pursue purpose)
As you embark on your journey of becoming a confident man, finding and actively pursuing your purpose is an essential component.
Without a sense of direction and a goal to work towards, a man cannot be truly fulfilled.
However, the true mark of a man of purpose is finding a cause that is larger than himself and finding ways to contribute to the lives of others.
With a strong driving purpose and clear vision, one can overcome challenges and obstacles that arise and remain steadfast in pursuing their goals.
Not only does having a purposeful life benefit oneself, but it can also make a man more attractive as a potential mate and a natural leader that others want to follow.
Therefore, becoming a man of purpose should be a top priority for any man wishing to live a fulfilling and successful life.
Action step: This one will take a little time.
I suggest beginning the practice of sitting quietly and writing in a journal in the morning or evening.
Maybe your family is part of your purpose, or maybe your purpose is to help the less fortunate.
It might be to bring excellence to whatever you undertake.
Maybe you need to find a way to contribute to the greater good.
I personally have started contributing to causes I believe in, such as fighting child trafficking and child hunger.
But you can bring a sense of purpose even to the seemingly most mundane activities.
One example of this is to live with gratitude and seeking to invest in other people, but you will need to flesh this out for yourself.
Photo by Mathew Thomas: https://www.pexels.com/photo/man-standing-on-rock-during-sunset-906531/
Now that we’ve gone through the different ways to start becoming a confident man, it’s important to consider a few key points.
It’s natural to want to find shortcuts or quick tips to project confidence, but true confidence takes hard work and dedication.
It’s about being genuine and authentic, rather than pretending to be something you’re not.
Putting in the effort to develop confidence may seem daunting, but the cost of being an insecure man can be far greater.
Ultimately, it’s up to you to weigh the price of both options and decide which path you want to take.
Remember, true confidence is not about tricks or shortcuts, but about investing in yourself and your personal growth.
Take it to the next level
To truly become a confident man, it takes more than just putting on a facade to impress others.
In fact, the key to growing into a man of real substance lies in investing the time and energy to develop yourself both personally and professionally.
One of the most effective ways to do so is to surround yourself with other men who share this same mindset and are where you want to be.
By surrounding yourself with individuals of true confidence and substance, you can foster a community of support and motivation that will help propel you towards your goals.
So, if you’re ready to commit to your personal growth, seek out those who can inspire and challenge you along the way.
For more on this topic, check out my post on the 51 signs of a confident man in 2023.
The journey to becoming a confident man is one that must be taken seriously.
It’s important to remember that it takes time and effort, but the rewards are immeasurable.
Invest in yourself by setting achievable goals, being knowledgeable on topics of importance to you, delivering on your commitments, having the courage to make decisions, and pursuing a purpose larger than yourself.
With these strategies, you will be well on your way to becoming a man of true confidence and substance.
- How to Set, and Achieve, Your Life Goals by Psychology Today
- How to be more decisive: Be confident and competent at work and at home by Tony Robbins